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英语小笑话 篇一

孩子的祈祷

Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents house。 At bedtime， the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers， when the younger one began praying at the top of his lungs: "I pray for a bicycle。 I pray for a new toy。"

两个小男孩在祖父母家过夜。睡觉的时候，两个小男孩跪在床边开始祈祷，这时小一些的孩子扯开嗓子大声喊道：“我祈求得到一辆自行车。我祈求有一个新玩具。”

His older brother leaned over， nudged him and said， "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isnt deaf。"

他的哥哥靠过来，用肘轻碰他说：“你为什么这么大声喊叫呢？上帝又不是聋子。”

To which the little brother replied， "No， but Grandma is!"

弟弟回答说：“是的，可是奶奶听不到呀！”

英语小笑话 篇二

三只乌龟

Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee。 Just as they got into the cafe， it started to rain。

The biggest turtle said to the smallest one， " Go home and get the umbrella。"

The little turtle replied， "I will， if you dont drink my offee。"

"We wont，" the other two promised。

Two years later the big turtle said to the middle turtle， "Well， I guess he isnt ing back， so we might as well drink his coffee。"

Just then a voice called from outside the door， "If you do， I wont go。"

三只乌龟决定去喝咖啡。它们刚到咖啡店的门口，就下起雨来。于是最大的那只乌龟对最小的乌龟说，“回家去取伞吧。”

最小的乌龟说，“如果你们不把我的咖啡喝了，我就去。”

“我们不喝，”另外两只乌龟答应说。

两年后，大乌龟对中乌龟说，“好吧，我猜他肯定不回来了，我们能够把它的咖啡喝掉了。”

正在这时，一个声音从门外传来，“你们要是喝了，我就不去。”

英语口语幽默笑话 篇三

Our manager at the restaurant where I worked was a much beloved, jovial man. But there was one subject you didn't dare discuss in front of him -- his height. or, should I say, his lack of day, he stormed through the door and announced angrily, “Someone just picked my pocket!” Most of my fellow waitresses and I were speechless, except for the one who blurted out, “How could anyone stoop so low?”

我们的餐厅经理是一位深受大家爱戴，和蔼而又快乐的人。但在他面前有一件事不能提--他的身高。或者，我应该说，他是有点矮！一天，经理怒气冲冲地撞门而入，高声说，“有人拿了我的钱包！”

我和其她大部女招待都没敢吱声，但有人却蹦出一句话：“哪有人能弯腰弯那么低的啊”！

英语小笑话 篇四

"Tom, whats the matter with your brother?" asked the mother in the kitchen. "Hes crying."

"Oh, nothing, Mum," replied Tom. "Im eating my cake. He is crying because I wont give him any."

"But has he finished his own cake?"

"Yes." said Tom. "And he also cried when I was helping him finish that."

"汤姆，你弟弟怎么了？" 妈妈在厨房里问。"他在哭。"

"没事儿，妈妈，" 汤姆答道。"我在吃我的蛋糕。他哭是因为我不给他吃。"

"他已经吃完自己的了么？"

"是的。" "我帮他吃完时，他也哭了。"

英语小笑话 篇五

Intelligent son

One day， the father lets eight year-old son send a letter， the son took the letter ， the father then remembered didnt write the address and addressees name on the envelope。

After the son es back， the father asks him: "You have thrown the letter in the mail box?"

"Certainly"

"You have not seen on the envelope not to write the address and the addressee name?"

"I certainly saw nothing written on the envelope。"

"Then why you didnt take it back?"

"I also thought that you do not write the address and the addressee， is for does not want to let me know that you do send the letter to who!"

聪明的儿子

有一天，父亲让八岁的儿子去寄一封信，儿子已经拿着信跑了，父亲才想起信封上没写地址和收信人的名字。

儿子回来后，父亲问他:“你把信丢进邮筒了吗？” “当然”“你没看见信封上没有写地址和收信人名字吗？”

“我当然看见信封上什么也没写”“那你为什么不拿回来呢？”

“我还以为你不写地址和收信人，是为了不想让我明白你把信寄给谁呢！”

英语小笑话 篇六

A Useful Way 一个有效的方法

Father: Jack， why do you drink so much water?

Jack: I have just had an apple， Dad。

Father: What"s that got to do with it?

Jack: I forgot to wash the apple。

爸爸：杰克，你干嘛喝这么多水呀？

杰克：我刚才吃了个苹果，爸爸。

爸爸：可是这跟喝水有什么关系呢？

杰克：我忘了洗苹果呀。

英语小笑话 篇七

Toms excuse 汤姆的借口

Teacher: Tom， why are you late for school every day?

Tom: Every time I e to the corner， a sign says， School-Go Slow。

教师：汤姆，您为什么每一天上学迟到？

汤姆：我每次走过拐角，一个路标上头写着：学校----慢行。

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